Phones & Misplaced Calls---Sometimes...

I remember, years and years ago, I was on date with some idiot.  He wanted to make me dinner.  A  neighbor suddenly came by and needed his help with something or another next door.  I waited in his kitchen until he came back.  While I was there, snooping around his dirty kitchen,  the phone rings.  I didn't feel comfortable answering the phone, so I let the answsering machine pick up the call.  Suddenly I heard a girl leave a message, asking if this guy had changed his mind and decided to go to Tahoe with her this weekend.  Interesting, I thought.  So, the idiot soon comes back, and I tell him that he got this call.  He listens to the message, laughs and simply laughs it off, with no explanation or anything.  I didn't ask either, so I make the mental note and I keep to myself.  I didn't know him that well, so why get upset, right?  This was before I knew that his  home was also refuge for  displaced, on the verge of criminal women  haven. I think I was the only female he ever dated who didn't have a jail record of some sort.  What could he have possibly seen in me anyway? 

 I  remember calling him one day, only to have one of these displaced women answer the phone.  I asked for him, and she asked me to call again and leave a message on the machine.  Which I did.  I made another mental note.  I should have known that he was already a two-timing idiot after the time I got that call from his cell phone.  I get a call at 11:30 pm at night from his cell.  Apparently, he had my number on speed dial, and he had mistakenly hit the button on his phone while he was at some mountain bar with this other chick.  It was a sign from God that I should have paid closer attention to.  I sat there on my couch, patiently listening.  I could hear  the music coming out of a juke box (Smooth by Rob Thomas...yeah I remember it like yesterday) and over  the music I could also barely hear him talk.  The other voice was obviously a drunk giggling woman.  Hmm...    I felt  a little better, (a little) after he informed me that his new "girlfriend" hit him on the head with a phone, and  of course after the 2 large pineapple and ham pizza delivery to his house. 

While I was dating my husband, I somehow mistakenlymisdialed a number and may have almost got someone in trouble.  A woman answered the phone.  Hmmm, I thought. 

"Is Rich there?" I ask. 

Silence

"Yes... (pregnant pause), Um, who is this?" the woman asks.

Silence

"This is Julie."

Silence

Okay, this feels really awkward right now, so I repeat the phone number to her.  "Did I dial the right number?"

Suddenly I hear laughter.  I had dialed the wrong number.  Wheeww...  That was a bit scary.  Richard is a very common name. 

Just the other day my husband's cell phone rang.  I went to answer it. 

"Hello!" It was an older sounding  woman.  She seemed to recognize my voice.  She asks:  "Do you think Rich could drive me to work tomorrow?"

Pregnant pause, on my part.

"Is this Ashley?" she asks.

"Um, no, I think you have the wrong number." 

Nope, my name isn't Ashley, or Maureen for that matter.  Is there anything worse than getting mail addressed to your husband's ex-wife?