Stupid is, what Stupid does..

I can't believe what I just had to do. 

Never in a million years would I have thought I would have to write an email to the ex-husband telling him to lower his child support payments.  Unbelievable I tell you.

For some reason, he can't get it across his thick skull that he no longer has to pay child support for his 18 year old daughter.  She is 18; classified as an adult.  Note to husband:  You no longer have to pay for her support.  Sure, she is still living at my house, but she is a full time student that needs to be at home.  There is no way she can live on her own at this time, BUT, you are no longer responsible.  IF YOU WANT to pay, send her money directly.  You aren't paying for her education, her STEP-FATHER is. 

Because my EX is paying more than what he has to (still paying for his daughter), NJ Child Support (I would just LOVE to knock on their office building right now) has been "crediting" his balance, thinking that California is going to pay me.  Excuse me?  Basically because my ex is sending more than he has to, they have been sending his checks back to him.  No..  It doesn't make sense; but Child Support has never made sense to me.  The ONLY reason why I have gotten ANY child support is based on the fact that I found out where my Ex ran off to on MY OWN.  Child support agencies simply do not have time to FIND parents that just leave the state trying to avoid paying for their children.  I had to be my own investigator.  I had to track my ex by mail I found in the garbage, email, and old neglected phone bills I  had to seek out from Ma Belle on my own.  The reason why they even sent it to me was because I WAS STILL on his account, and he left with it UNPAID.

NOW, because two child support agencies don't know how to work with each other, or know each others' state laws, I will get no support for this month.  My Ex already paid twice this month.  Yes, he is paying, but NJ is just giving it back to him.  Yes, this is the same state that threatened him jail time, and at the same time took his handwritten payroll slips. "We can't prove this aren't his real wages." Whatever.  Drive by to two of the radiator shops and ask WHO is the owner.  It doesn't take a rocket scientist people!!  Crazy. 

Now the measly amount that I get for my one son is not why I'm so angry.  It's a car payment; I can make do without it this month.  I am more angry because I remember, years ago when I was working at this job, and my part time at the department store, and my other 3rd weekend job solicitation over the phone.  I remember a time where I lived from pay check to pay check, alone with my two children, juggling bills, pre posting checks while at the same time wondering when my child support check would roll in.  I remember trading in music CD's for cash so I could buy groceries.  I am no longer in that situation, thank God; but I know there are so many parents out there that are in that same situation. 

So I write a letter to the EX telling him to send less.  I call the EX and tell him to pay less.  He apparently doesn't know what is going on.  He is clueless.  "I sent two checks already this month!"  Okay, I believe that one because according to what I saw on the NJ website, he did.  "I was never told to pay less.."  Okay, that is a lie.  He actually "offered" to continue to pay more if I "dropped the case."  Can you believe that crap? 

Oh well. 

It's Friday.  Memorial Weekend!  YAHOO..  Things to do:  Relax.  Count my blessings.  Write that book:  What To Do IF You Ex Moves Out Of State To Avoid Paying Child Support. 

Have a happy weekend!!  I intend to!