Cell Phone Chatter

"I've never had that happen from an online relationship, but obviously, you have." 

I'm strolling the local Target store with baby, and as I'm looking at the row of baby formula, (by the way, Target is the best place to buy baby formula), when I hear this girly girl from the next aisle having a very personal phone conversation with whom I presume to be a "boyfriend" while looking at the shaving cream. 

When I hear the line "online relationship", of course, my interest grows.  It just gets better afterwards...

"Well, I never had a relationship in another state, and never had to run away from a wife and a kid.  I did go out with a guy who had to go to jail, but I guess that is different."

It is just unbelievable how some people have no problem whatsoever telling the whole world about their personal life-no matter how embarrassing or disfunctional it may sound. 

I kept running into this girl, in the black skirt set and clinkie heels, and the phone never left her right ear.  It was like it was surgically glued to her hand.  Each time I saw her, she continued talking with this person, and at each turn of the aisle, the conversation reversed from the "woman scorned" talk, of, "I don't care about you anymore, you've done me wrong," to the "You just don't want to try anymore?"  For God's sake woman, get a clue---even I can tell the person you are talking to is a loser---open your eyes!

By the time I was at checkout, guess who was behind me?  "So, are you saying that you don't want to wait until I get back fom Idaho to talk?  Do you just want to end it now?" 

The games people play...  I think this one deserves the guy.

 

 

 

 

Take A Lookie

As Forrest Gump reminds us, you can tell a lot about someone by his or her shoes.  You can also do the same if you look into a woman’s purse.  I am looking down into my purse right now, and all I can do is sigh.  From my chair I see a receipt from Longs, a receipt from Burger King (my kids were hungry), a 6 ounce empty baby bottle and bottle cap, cherry flavored chap stick, a doctor appointment reminder card, a dentist appointment card, a camera, checkbook, my wallet, my son’s wallet, a hair tie, a hair brush, my cosmetic bag, (lipstick, mascara, powder, concealer, moisturizer sample from Mary Kay), a small address book, a cell phone, a piece of paper of registration requirements for my daughter’s new school, and 3 stray pennies.  If you are curious about the shoes I am wearing, they are my black, low, open toed sandals, from, you guessed it-Payless.  Now, what does this all tell you?